Rupert Grint Press Archives

Plain Wayne Rooney gets red hot with age

Polly Hudson

So, after all that build up, how much of a disappointment was Wayne and Coleen’s wedding?

I was expecting a wall-to-wall tackfest, filled to the rafters with drunk, desperate celebrities they’d never met before and male family members in drag.

Instead it was elegant, intimate, transvestite-free and the bride looked beyond beautiful in an amazing but understated dress. And weirdly, for the first time ever, the groom didn’t look bad either. Seriously.

And this dramatic realisation has led me to a new evolutionary theory. Ginger men get better looking with age.

Take Prince Harry – and I would, if I wasn’t old enough to be his great-grandmother and far too common. A few years ago he was the red-headed, pink-faced, scrawny ugly duckling to hunky Wills’ swan. Now he’s a beefy, ripped, ginger Adonis and Wills is balding, out of shape and looks like Prince Charles’s Mini Me. Sorry, Mini One.

There are millions of examples of gingers improving with age in Celebville, too.

While Daniel Radcliffe is slowly becoming less attractive as his eyebrows take over his face and that growth spurt seems less likely to happen, Rupert Grint is now officially a fire-headed hottie.

Billie Piper need no longer feel ashamed that she was married to Chris Evans, who has matured like a fine vin rouge. Nowadays Boris Becker could show me his cupboard any time.

And I wouldn’t give up OR let down Rick Astley either.

By this reckoning, Wayne Rooney will be the new Becks in five years, proving yet again that Coleen has a sort of Midas touch. But instead of gold, everything she touches turns to ginger. If she’s lucky.

But there is always an exception to the rule. No matter what he does, wears or however old he gets, Mick Hucknall will forever be minging.

Original article can be found here at Mirror I , June 19, 2008

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